hey y'all. Loser here.

So...I'm basically useless. But I'm also somehow super arrogant, despite how useless I am, and I stress other people out and point out their faults to try to make myself look better and deflect any and all criticism.

I'm not just a loser, you see. I'm an asshole.

Not the self-assured, confident asshole. Nope, I'm the whiney, scared, sad, lonely, insecure, selfish, ambitious, Gollum-like asshole who thinks everything is the end of the fucking world and who is about as loveable and attractive as gangrene.

I can't seem to crawl out of the emotional ditch I've worked so diligently to create. I also have a talent for sucking the joy out of my surroundings and making people around me feel just as miserable.

Everyone hates me, obviously.

Actually no - people who don't know me think I'm fine.

Also, I cut myself, because I'm such a loser that I'm an uber-emo loser and all.

I'm a 27-year-old woman. I am too old for such childish shenanigans.

I do it mainly because I don't get my way.

Yep, I'm basically a petulant 5-year-old masquerading as a decent adult human being.

And I have the nerve to judge other people and make them feel uncomfortable.

I think, if someone were to shoot me in the head, it would be such a relief.